Listening to the acceptance speeches at an awards ceremony a few years ago, a friend remarked “Gee…does everyone have to thank their husband?” It was getting repetitive. Most of the honorees (I don’t remember the situation…but since most of the attendees were women, it was probably romance writers…) started their speeches with “I’d like to thank my husband…”
I thought about that observation for a moment, then I said “I know what you mean, but, can you imagine why someone wouldn’t thank their husband?”
Honorees in any situation should always at least include their spouse, if not place them on the pedestal of staunchest supporters. Writers, in particular, have reason to make sure our spouses are thanked effusively whether we’re being honored or not. Most writers spend months or, more likely, years before they see any returns on their hard work at all. Many writers never make enough to even out to more than a dollar an hour when all is said and done. Yet we keep going, hoping that our hard work will eventually pay off.
Our spouses keep going too. They put up with us getting up in the middle of the night and turning on the light so we can scribble down an idea. They tolerate us thinking about imaginary people more than we think about real people. They love us when we’re wailing about how we hate everything we’ve ever written.
In 2010, I asked my hubby if he’d support me doing NaNoWriMo. It would mean that every night in November I would be working hard at writing about 2,000 words, to the goal of completing a novel of at least 50,000 words by the end of the month. He had only one requirement. He said “This time, you have to do something with it.”
I did. That was the beginning of my writing career. I saw a few short stories published in magazines and anthologies, even though I didn’t get paid. Then came the first paycheck, a whopping $7!
My hubby does mornings so I can get enough sleep after writing late into the night. He listens to me ramble on about sticking points in my writing so I can work them out. (He also understands that I’m not looking for feedback… I just need him to listen…) He has celebrated every new release with me, and stood by me when frustrations with the publishing process had me pulling out my hair. He encouraged me when a project I’d put six months of hard work into completely fell apart.
Today Rob and I are celebrating our twentieth wedding anniversary. More than a dozen moves, two kids, going back to school, losing family members, it’s been a very full two decades. All through the darkest times, I wanted nothing more than to cling to him tighter. In the best of times, he lifted me up and together we soared.
When we got married, I made him promise me we’d have a fiftieth anniversary someday. Sixty or seventy would be even better. He is my great love, my partner, the father of my children, my biggest supporter and the most wonderful husband a writer could ever ask for.
Happy anniversary hubby! I love you to infinity and beyond.